Marriage

            What is our Father’s plan?  Why is it important?  What does it have to do with marriage and family?  

As David A. Bednar so eloquently explained, “The Father’s plan is designed to provide direction for His children, to help them become happy, and to bring them safely home to Him.”[1] We were super excited about this plan in the pre-existence.  We would all receive a body and have the opportunity to come to Earth.  We knew that this trip into mortality would be difficult.  We knew there would be trials and challenges, but we were excited and ready for the chance of a life time.  Satan was also coming to Earth, except under different circumstances.  David A. Bednar continues, “Satan does not have a body, he cannot marry, and he will not have a family.  And he persistently strives to confuse the divinely appointed purposes of gender, marriage, and family.”[1] Satan’s goal is to keep us confused, so that we are unhappy and miserable like he is.  Because we are loved by our heavenly parents, Heavenly Father has given us a prophet to lead and guide us here on Earth.  Some council we have been given by the prophet is in the document, The Family: A Proclamation to the World, which states: “The family is ordained of God.  Marriage between and man and woman is essential to His eternal plan.  Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity.  Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ.”[2] As we learn to implement these principles into our daily lives, they will provide us with a protection against the adversary. On the other hand, if we do nothing with these principles, they will not benefit us.

            Bruce C. Hafen explains, “Marriage is by nature a covenant, not just a private contract one may cancel at will.”[3] A covenant marriage is plain and simple, both man and woman promise to each other and with God that they will keep the commandments and be true to each other in all aspects of their life.  A contractual marriage between man and woman is where the marriage can be changed or cancelled at time by means of a divorce.   Bruce C. Hafen continues, “But when troubles come to a covenant marriage, the husband and wife work them through. They marry to give and to grow, bound by covenants to each other, to the community, and to God. Contract companions each give 50 percent; covenant companions each give 100 percent.”[3] Brother Hafen continues to talk about how every marriage will be tested so it will be up to the individuals to give it their best in order for it to be a successful, happy marriage.

            One way Hafen explains that marriage will be tested is by excessive individualism.  He continues by saying: “The adversary has long cultivated this overemphasis on personal autonomy, and now he feverishly exploits it. Our deepest God-given instinct is to run to the arms of those who need us and sustain us. But he drives us away from each other today with wedges of distrust and suspicion. He exaggerates the need for having space, getting out, and being left alone. Some people believe him—and then they wonder why they feel left alone.”[3] Satan is ready and waiting for any chance he can get to weave his way into our lives.  He want us to get discouraged and ready to give up.  He likes it when we argue or fight.  He wants us to wander on social media sites and waste our time viewing material that is of no worth.  He wants us to spend time relaxing playing mindless games on the Internet or gaming and just get away from all of our stress.  If we start to give up, we are more vulnerable to the enticing’s of Satan. We must always remember that these trials are part of mortality, and part of the test to see if we will remain faithful and be willing to follow our Father’s plan.  We must come out on top.  We must force ourselves to be strong, uniting together and with God to be able to prevent temptation to enter our lives. 

            I believe that once you enter into a marriage, it is not all about yourself, but instead it involves both husband and wife who constantly work together.  Bruce C. Hafen explains, “Covenant marriage requires a total leap of faith: they must keep their covenants without knowing what risks that may require of them. They must surrender unconditionally, obeying God and sacrificing for each other. Then they will discover what Alma called “incomprehensible joy.”[3] I know that as I sacrifice something I want to do, and instead unite with my husband to do something together, it is much more fun and exciting, and we grow closer together as a couple. This doesn’t have to be something fun. It can be a hard job that you work together on, but if you unite, it makes it more enjoyable.  It also provides ways to communicate and show your appreciation for each other. This brings joy and happiness to me.

References:

1 Bednar, David A. (2006) Marriage is Essential To His Eternal Plan. Ensign. (June 2006) 82-87.

2  The First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (1995) The Family: A Proclamation To the World.

3 Hafen, Bruce C. (1996) Covenant Marriage. Ensign. (November 1996) 26.