In Mosiah 3 :19 it states, “For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticing of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.”
In overcoming the natural man, one needs to repent of their imperfections. None of us are perfect, therefore, we each have things we need to improve upon. The biggest step may be to realize your need to change your behavior and wanting something better. I don’t think anyone wants to be in bondage, or feel that there is no hope for improvement. By becoming meek, humble, and submissive we become teachable and can learn through the spirit how we might progress in this life. Marriage has its ups and downs. Marriage is not a state of perfection, but something that couples work on constantly to grow closer to each other. I am confidant to say that each marriage will have different trials or challenges. Some challenges we have had to deal with over the years have been moving. Sometimes this required kids to have to change schools, which makes it more stressful for the kids on top of having to make new friends. There were times when my husband was deploying to locations far away, and the family did not get to travel with him. This put a lot of responsibility on my shoulders. Luckily, we had a strong family and neighborhood that supported us in times of need. How we deal with these trials or challenges is the key. Elder Joseph Wirthlin (2007) explains “the greatest manifestations of love are the simple acts of kindness and caring,”[1] we extend to others. I loved the example Elder Wirthlin shared of an older couple where the husband wanted to do something nice for his wife. She was no longer able to care for herself, so he would paint her fingernails for her. This was something that his wife really enjoyed. It wasn’t a big task or something extravagant. It was just a small act of kindness. Elder Wirthlin said, “True love lasts forever. It is eternally patient and forgiving. It believes, hopes, and endures all things. This is the love our Heavenly Father bears for us.”[1] If we strive to put off the natural man, and become like Him, we can emulate this kind of love in our marriages and families.
I have learned that there has to be give and take in a marriage. I am not always right. Sometimes I have to take steps to repair the negative conversations that we have together. In order to repair the negative, I need to apologize and find ways to express my appreciation for all that my husband does for me and our family. I have learned that it is easier to love, if you can give up your selfish desires and strive to become a unit, with both husband and wife working together to become one. I also have to agree with Dr. Gottman, as I have read his book and try to apply principles in my marriage to make it a stronger. Dr. Gottman says, “that the key to a happy marriage is friendship.”[2] How profound is this? I do believe that I married my best friend. Marriage has its ups and down, meaning there are challenges every day you will need to face. If you put forth the effort, and continue to try to become like our Savior, you marriage will be strengthened and it can last forever!
References:
1-Wirthlin, Joseph B. (2007). Retrieved from: https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vRl0Y5eE1B1aS38KR3aPQ3gqfBlOC0emEI5cHeN21j59KzrTdLom4zRelXmLcy8YK1NvBBpkAbF5136/pub
2-Gottman, John M. and Silver, Nan. (1999,2015) The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Published in the United States by Harmony Books.
Up, Up and Beyond 